Home for Wayward Sluts: 2014 http://kinkunveiled.blogspot.ca/?zx=8dcd321b700cd6d8

Wednesday, 31 December 2014

Slutty New Years! But wait...it already happened??

New Years Eve is a great time of year. It has to be hands down the easiest evening to get kisses on.

Of course there are certain events like Subspace in Toronto who had a fetish role play night on December 27th...which was really a brilliant idea. You see, New Years is always a crazy busy, expensive night for any party.  All venues charge 3x as much (at least) and it's always goddamn impossible to get a cab. Hotels in Toronto are all booked and will fuck you over too. If you have kids...try getting a new years eve babysitter!!

Have you ever spent the new years eve mostly in a goddamn line up? What a fucking retarded move that is. So I appreciate Craiger's ingenuity in holding a 'roleplay' event where we all pretend it is New Years -- 4 days early.

Of course, fetish attire was a must (meaning PVC, latex, leather, uber goth, formal uniforms, rubber and of course, corsets and lingerie.)

So why not have a party, complete with countdown, champagne,  noisemakers, hats, balloons and streamers several days early?  Genius! Fucking genius.

Happy NEW YEARS everyone!

The Icelandic Phallological Museum

Yes, those are testicle lampshades. Why do you ask?
What is the Icelandic Phallological Museum? Why, it is only a museum devoted entirely to the male appendage.  But it is even more specific than that.  It is devoted to the dicks of Iceland.

The owner, Sigurður Hjartarson originally started his penis collection as part of friends joking and giving him penis gifts because...well, that shit is funny.  You see, he originally owned a bull penis that was used as some sort of a whip (I do not include anything on bull penis whips on this site, to date. Floggers yes, bull penis whips no. (Not that there's anything wrong with bull penis whips.)  So a friend acquired 4 more bull penises and gave them as a gift. Soon whale dicks were showing up and his penis collection swelled from there.

A bull penis whip. It looks hard.
phallological_museumThe museum currently holds 280 cocks.  That record has been beaten in one sitting by some porn stars but that's still an awful lot of cock. The smallest is only 2mm long, (that is really fucking tiny in inches) and the biggest? A whale penis of course, weighing in at 450 kg (I will be nice and convert: 990 lbs) and was originally 5m long (that is 197 inches). That is 191 inches bigger than the average man. Hell, that is is 810 lbs more than the average MAN!

The museum is located in Reykjavik, Iceland -- because a museum of this much importance must be in the capital. It attracts over 11000 tourists a year and, of course, 60% of them are women.

This museum also boasts to have every penis of every mammal located on Iceland. Included a human penis. Now that is the complete package.

Sunday, 28 December 2014

Pregnancy Fetish

Pregnancy is a fetish that makes almost makes complete evolutionary sense while failing entirely as a successful breeding strategy.  It is a fetish for and being hugely turned on by procreating and pregnant women. Yup, that's a fetish too.

Men often find pregnant women attractive because they are a walking billboard for fertility.  Also, they have a healthy glow about them that is extremely appealing.

There may also something to this fetish that has to do with parental imprinting -- as lactating/pregnant fetishes are by far the most common in older siblings. This is probably do to the fact that we tend to find those like our parents attractive and if we remember our mom as pregnant or nursing...well, that gets imprinted too.

Guys can fetishize preggo bellies also because, well, she is obviously taken, pregnant and training to be a mother and all that. She is supposed to be good and chaste so fetishize that and you are being really 'wrong' and 'dirty' by making a mom-to-be into a sex object. That combines with the fact that she is already taken and bam, there-you-go!

Pregnancy can also be strongly associated with a time where the woman is unspeakably horny (this is a biological attribute that keeps the father around and interested)... but a sex-crazed-horny woman is always of interest to men.  Additionally, I have also heard that pregnant women have their tits get bigger...something I have not yet been able to definitively verify in person as of yet and more evidence is required.

And speaking of being of interest to men. a
pregnant woman has a body that is constantly changing. Her body is constantly doing new things and altering its form...making her a source of constant fascination and wonder.

I know that women often feel like they are a bloated hippopotamus and as less attractive because they have just gained 40 pounds in a society fixated on being thin...but pregnancy is not being fat: it is being fertile and performing a function that is integral to the continuation of the species.  It is a god-like power to bring new life forward. And being powerful is always sexy.

Friday, 26 December 2014

Merry Christmas, sluts!

Hope you are getting all the toys that you deeply desire.

*singing* Just fist me, this Christmas!
Do me underneath the Christmas tree
For get the presents, just get the Crisco
'cause Christmas means fisting to me!

God I love that song at this time of year.

Seriously though, you should always have Christmas sex. It's like birthday sex except, it being Christmas, everybody is the lucky recipient.

May your holiday season be filled with squirts of joy!


Tuesday, 23 December 2014

120 Days of Sodom

Required reading.

If you have not read anything by the Marque de Sade (who is the namesake of the term Sadist and a key author of the term Sadomasochism) then you really should read something, for fuck-sakes!

He was a French aristocrat and extreme pervert who was most definitely into all things perverted such as (but not limited to) whipping, beating, caning, bondage, squirting, forced orgasms, jailbait, gratuitous sex and violence and incest.

painful_bdsm_shaved_pussyYeah, he was  a well rounded pervert.

If you have not read anything by him...here's a link to 120 Days of Sodom as an early kinky
Christmas present to you. It is the full, uncensored version of the e-book in pdf format.

You are welcome.

Monday, 22 December 2014

To My Little Girl

Merry Christmas to my little girl. You are truly a young, cock-gagging, piss-drinking, anal-fucking, porn-watching, tear-crying, age-playing, girl-lusting, multi-orgasmic, as-to-mouthing, female-ejaculating, fountain-squirting, 20-times-a-day-fapping little puke slut.

Thank God for you and perfect your little tits.  <3

I know sometimes you feel insecure and/or intimidated by me...but *grabs-you-by-your-pony-tail-and-yanks-your-hair-HARD* I fucking love you just the way you are.

Every slave should aspire to be as delightfully submissive as you.

Sunday, 21 December 2014

Christmas Scuptures

Paul McCarthy, a Los Angeles based artist, is the man. He somehow convinced the city of Paris to allow him to make a 24m tall sculpture of a 'Christmas Tree' in Place Vendome in the capitol of France.

This 'Christmas Tree' doesn't look that much like a tree to me. It reminds me of something else entirely. I can't quite place it though.

I guess it kinda looks like this? Maybe? 

I mean, they barely look the same.

You were probably thinking it looked like the Christmas Tree it was supposed to be...something like this, right?

They are practically identical. Am I right?

Look again at the Christmas tree in Paris:
If you see a butt plug you are just plain a pervert and not at all in the Christmas spirit.

Now Paul McCarthy also did a lovely 'Santa holding a tree' in Rotterdam:

Which doesn't look at all like various anal toys:

Being held by a garden gnome:

That would be ridiculous. I kinda feel a kinship to Paul McCarthy as if I could con people into erecting these statues for the shear pleasure of making my inner 13-year-old giggle...I totally would!

Merry Christmas!!

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Blowjob Bib

OK, here's one another last minute Christmas gift that won't break the bank: a blowjob bib! Yes, for just $3.29  You can BUY IT HERE.

Now this is probably being offered as a gag gift (pun intended) -- but if you are in the habit of giving/receiving Max Hardcore style blowjobs...it could definitely come in handy:

Sure, it does take a bit of an extreme hardcore pervert to really appreciate the practical use of such an item...but that's what I am here for. :)

That said, if you are throat gagging a girl without her permission and assurance that she is getting off on being degraded like this...then you might just be an asshole. I'm just saying.  

Still, it seems like an item that would only be sold at lame-assed vanilla sex stores so it is mostly a joke. Mostly.  But if they are going to sell it as a sex toy, I am going to use it as a sex toy. 

Friday, 19 December 2014

Wartenburg Pinwheel

Wartenberg Pinwheels are a medical instrument that is not only cheap...but incredibly fun.  What is it?  It is an all metal instrument that has a rotating disc of pins on it. Originally it was used by doctors to test nerve function but now, like everything, it can be used for sex!

Via Amazon
This little gizmo is super cheap at $4 from Amazon and it can be used on tender sensitive bits like nipples and shaved pussies. It does not look like a friendly device...so make she she gets a good look at it before you use it.

It is designed to roll so you can glide it over her and give her all kinds of prickly sensations. 

It is sharp but not overly sharp -- so just don't press too hard and break the skin and you will be fine.  

Bonus technique:
Put it in the freezer so it is really cold.

Aren't BDSM toys fun?!  With Christmas coming...this gift certainly doesn't seem like it is $4 and a great gift for any kink folk in your life.

Fruit Masterbators

Here is a sex toy that answers all the wonderful fruit without the fructose fantasies you've been having.  You know you like fruit. Everyone likes fruit. But do you *like* like fruit?  Does fruit get you hard as a rock?

Ummm...me neither. But if it did...then I would want to get this Fruit Masturbator, right? I mean, it's the fruit equivalent of the blow up sex doll. And blow up sex dolls are super sexy, right?  It's almost better than finding an actual girl. And you know what is even harder to find? A fruit that won't reject just because you are not only not of the same species but you are not even an plant!

Well, to save you from the horrid silence of fruit rejection...then fruit masturbators are definitely the way to go.

 I know, why not just get a real fruit you ask...naw, these dongfruit are awesome because it allows you to fuck the fruit of your fantasies like raspberries (which are normally way to small to actually fuck.)  It's the fruit equivalent of wanting to fuck Tinkerbelle.
Kinda like sex with a raspberry
At least it is under $10 and so weird it will make a fantastic stuffing stocker.  Especially for Grampa.
Damn,,,guys will stick their dicks in anything. 

Thursday, 18 December 2014

Female Ejaculation

I have done a lot of posts on female ejaculation (also called squirting and shejaculation) and so I am going to sum them all up in one place for the holidays! No more digging around! Here is a comprehensive list of links to all my squirting posts divided up by category with Exercises,  News, Science, General, and Spirituality.

Exercises and Practical:

hand_position_to_female_ejaculateHow to Find your G-Spot -- it's easy...but if
you're still in the dark, this will help track the g-spot
down so you can go to town on it. 

Top 10 Squirting Lessons -- What you really need to know about squirting: especially if you squirt a lot. 

How to do Kegel Exercises to Make You Squirt -- Squeezing is pleasing! Here are 6 detailed exercises that really work. 

Advance Kegel Exercises with Weights -- Be sure to build up to the exercises as it is not for beginners. It is advanced strength training for your vagina. 

The Divine Nectar -- a video guide to female ejaculation.

A Good Video Explains Squirting -- I didn't make this, but it's good. 

How to Mastubate to Squirt -- practice makes perfect!
Squirting and Dehydration -- I will also put this in science but it has lots of practical information that
you should know. 

Make Your Pussy Taste Great -- ok while not expressly about female ejaculion...it's something you might like to know. 

PC Muscle Exercises Part I - How to do PC muscle and vaginal strength training. 

PC Muscle Exercises Part II -- Now that you are getting the hang of it, let's give those muscles some more tone!


Female Ejaculation was Banned in the UK -- December 2nd 2014.  Yes, this is real and not a joke.  

Geez, I was sure I did  a couple more news posts...one of which was one lesbians taking the ban of sale of squirt porn DVDs to court because it was banned for being piss porn -- and the scientists had to weigh in that, no it is not pee. But somehow I can't find that post. Maybe I goofed and wrote the article but forgot to press 'publish' :-/    Unfortunately, I have far ore unpublished articles than published -- as I rule at the half written post!


squirting_with_a_vibratorThe Female Prostate -- it's an anatomy lesson that focuses on structures and function.  Learn about
the Skene's glands and also what us in female
ejaculation from a chemical perspective. 

Why Women Squirt/Why Women Ejaculate: an hypothesis on the evolutionary reason behind female ejaculation. 

Female Ejaculation in other Primates -- most notably the bonobo have regular squirting orgasms.  (There is more on Bonobo sexuality here too)

I want to Study Female Ejaculation -- if someone is going to get grant money to study squirting...i might as well be me. Methods, materials and scope of study provided.

Squirting and Dehydration -- medical advise to keep you safe while you cum like a banshee. 

Is it Safe to Drink Female Ejaculate? -- Science weighs in on this important topic. 

General Squirt Related Topics:

spreader_bar_female_ejaculationOn Female Body Fluids -- there has been much
taboo about all female bodily fluids and perhaps this
is part of the reason that female ejaculation has rarely been discussed in the past. 

Anally Induced Squirting -- some say it's the best way to squirt...but anal sex can definitely trigger squirting in a big way!

On Fake Squirting -- sometimes people with limited sexual experience assume that squirting is all faked or that women can't possibly produce the volumes seen in porn. Well, while it may be possible to fake it...most is real and I have made too many girls squirt (some for the first time) to have any doubt whatsoever. 

Squirting -- a favorite post on the awesomeness of female ejaculation.

Why Squirting is Sexy -- answering the question of why men find girls who female ejaculate so sexy.

girl_squirts_on_fucking_machineShejaculating - female ejaculation is such a long and awkward phrase where men just have cum. So let's agree to call it shejaculation and the fluid is shejaculate.  

Epic Organisms: Passing Out -- yes... squirting was involved.

Vagina Weight Lifting Record --Strong muscles help you squirt...but how strong can you get?

Milking Slaves -- but the milk is actually shejaculate. An erotic recounting of a fun day in the life.

On Squirting: A Woman's Perspective.

Give Me Your Pussy Juice -- An example of the shenanigans that happen in my bathroom :)

The Beauty of Squirting -- It's just so damn pretty! (Pictures, photos and animated gif included, of course.)


dildo_machineFemale Ejaculation and the Transfer of Tantric Energy -- a post on the spiritual aspects of female ejaculation and the mysterious orgasmic energies it contains.

Cumming Soon:

Squirt Bukakkes 

Any Questions or want me to cover a topic about female ejaculation that I missed...just let me know!

Wednesday, 17 December 2014

Prostitution in Canada (Sex and the Law Update)

As far as laws goes, the laws in Canada regarding prostitution make no sense. You see, sex workers in Canada made a constitutional challenge and had the laws against prostitution struck down on December 13, 2013.  This was sparked from an October 2012 Ontario Court appeal against these bullshit laws. (I did a post about some of the crazy legal bullshit surrounding prostitution laws here.)  The government, with the laws on prostitution being struck down as unconstitutional, choose to keep enforcing the old laws until a new law was passed (because we should keep arresting sex workers even though we know it is opposed to everything we hold true as Canadians.)    Well, they passed a new law and it is not only completely illogical, it makes things worse.

First off, I want to rage against all the crap
puritan cunts who are trying to enforce their conservative agenda against all things sexual -- because Christians all know that sex is wrong and sinful.  The courts have ruled that the laws against prostitution are illegal. Wake up and pay attention you dumbasses! Instead, this is their new solution:  Selling sex is legal but buying it is illegal.  What?!??

Let's look at this from a logical point of view: FAIL.    I propose we also legalize selling weed but arrest anyone caught buying or smoking it. Additionally, let's make driving cars legal but parking illegal.  Also, coins with heads are legal but coins with tails are illegal.

no_bad_women_just_bad_lawsSadly, this worthless piece of legal excrement  (aka Bill C-36) went through the Senate on Nov. 4th,
2014 because the senate passes everything and apparently no one in government read the damn thing and said, 'but that doesn't make any damn sense!'

It was presented to the public as 'The Swedish model' or 'the Nordic model' (even though only Sweden made the mistake the first time.)  Most Scandinavian countries have decriminalized prostitution entirely and Denmark, for example, only has pimping and running a brothel as illegal -- because men engage in these activities to exploit women. Just because one Scandinavian country fucked up doesn't mean you have to repeat their mistake when al the other ones went the other way. We should at least have come up with a homegrown solution: especially considering the Swedish law defies all logic. But I suspect that the optics of presenting as a Nordic model made this bitter pill easier for the public to swallow.

Speaking of the public, polls were used by the Conservative Government to show support for their continued crackdown on sex workers. They sited a June 2014 Angus Reid poll saying it showed 45% of the people thought prostitution should be illegal. They completely ignored the fact that 51% of the population thought prostitution should be legal and the previous Angus Reid poll stated that 65% thought prostitution and brothels should be legal (21% strongly agreed to this.)

Those that disagree with prostitution were mainly concerned with the exploitation of children and women being sold in underground markets as sex slaves.  But these concerns can and should be directly addressed: they are independent crimes that are more kidnapping and violent coercion based than prostitution based.  I image a poll asking, 'Should children be allowed to be sold into violent sex slavery for the profit of mob pimps?' would get well under 50% of the popular approval. Part of me is shudders to think that it would be as high as 2% -- because people are dumb and can't read the question (or the mob pimps are answering).  The simple solution is best here: if you are concerned about a problem: directly address the problem.

So where does this leave us?  With the focus shifting to arresting Johns instead of whores, the trade will be driven further underground and into more desolate locations which will almost certainly put more lives of sex workers at risk. Which in my opinion, is highly immoral.

Monday, 15 December 2014

Penis Size Does Matter

We have all heard the lie: that penis sized doesn't matter. That girls really don't care about the size of one's penis. "It's not the size of the ship it's the motion of the ocean" and all that. Well, this is simply not true.

Sure, penis size does not have a massive impact on female -- once it is inside of her. Unless you are overly small...like 3 inches...it just isn't a big factor. In fact thickness is far more important than length and a cock that is 12" long can be really quite uncomfortable for a female and even painful. But the trick is getting you dick into her, am I right? Well guess what? Women are very attracted to big dicks.

Researches have studied penis size and found almost no correlation to the amount of pleasure she gets from it during sex and the biggest factor is what you do with it. So when the sex researchers at the University of Ottawa decided to study how penis size affected how attractive a male was, they expected it to have very little real impact. They couldn't have been more wrong.

The researches found that cock size is most definitely related to attractiveness. In fact, it is as
A tattoo of a baby holding a finger. Executed badly.
important as height and almost as important than shoulder to hip ratio (the most important factor). So a big pot bellied troll with a giant cock like Ron Jeremy *IS* more attractive to women than a shorter man with an average sized dick.  Also, women were not just interested in length: a shorter but thicker cock also rated very favorably.

The tests were done with computer generated images that varied proportions and then the sample group was asked to rate the images based on attractiveness.

Now I am not exactly tiny and I have definitely noticed girls being appreciative of size -- and I am clearly thicker than average (by a fair bit) and I can say, when I have 'revealed' myself I have certainly noticed that the female liked it. A lot. But I have mostly seen girls reacting to my cock and generally speaking I have been bigger than the other guy when I have taken a girl with another man. But I did think it had a lot to do with the girl liking cock and reacting accordingly.  But apparently there is more to it.

Sorry ladies, but these cock shots were too funny not to post 
Still, I am surprised that it rated almost as highly as height when judging attractiveness of naked men. But if you are less endowed...does it really matter? Generally by the time she sees your penis it is a bit late for her to be judging your attractiveness and deciding if she wants to fuck you. 

Saturday, 13 December 2014

Female Ejaculation Banned in UK

I just looked into the amendment that the Brits put forward last year (early this year?) to alter their 2003 Communications Act and found that it fucking passed on December 2nd!! The new Audiovisual Media Services Regulations 2014 now puts all 'video on demand online pornography' (aka any porn videos from the web!) under the same strict rules inflicted by prudish British twits on DVD sales in that nation. So any porn produced in the UK must adhere to these insane, draconian rules which includes a ban on female ejaculation!!

squirt_drinkingI am (almost) too outraged for words! How in the fuck can you ban female ejaculation? And what kind of sexist bullshit is this that a man can squirt his cum all over a girl's face/ass/pussy/tits/feet/you-get-the-picture and women aren't allowed to cum on film? Are you fucking kidding me???

I say this again and no, it's not a joke: the UK banned squirting from their porn!

Shall we start enforcing female circumcision at birth too? You goddamn stupid motherfuckers!!

First off, this shit has got to be taken down.  Surely the British have some form of Equality Legislation or a Charter of Human Rights that this explicitly violates.  I am not in Britain but if this Jupiter-sized-load-of-shit was in Canada I would personally campaign against it and lead the charge and make a constitutional challenge or whatever is most appropriate to eliminate legislation so blatantly anti-female that I am surprised women in Britain still have the vote.

Squirting or female ejaculation is a common type of female orgasm and as such should be encouraged by law and taught in school -- not banned by some Victorian era nitwit who wears mormon underwear to help save them from masturbating.

Whomever voted 'yes' to pass this law should be punished by placing them at ground zero in a female ejaculation bukkake. (I will test out this punishment first, just to be sure it is not too dangerous. Safety first.)

Here is the list of stuff the prudes banned:

Female Ejaculation  (so mad still! wtf!!  So women have the skene's glands but are not supposed to use them? Please dear, no orgasms on camera...this is porn after all. And for god's sakes no squirting orgasm during anal sex or we'll have to reshoot the entire scene!!)

Humiliaton (as a former Torontonian, Rob Ford made it a way of life in our city...I can't see anything wrong with this either.)

Fisting (because...consenting lesbians never ever fist each other?? Why are they trying to stop girls from having fun?? This one makes me nuts too!! Is this specifically to target gay porn makers and discourage girls from making others girls cums?? *fists a law-maker in the ass*)

Facesitting (yet again, why oh why?!? The very British Monty Python even sang about it! Is it that some Dommes could do it and enjoy it? I am seriously perplexed.

Spanking  (because no consenting adults *ever* do this!! OMFG, Does this mean they will ban Monty Python's the Holy Grail??!?)

Aggressive whipping (spanking is out but a light whipping is fine?? Makes perfect sense.)

Caning (they forgot to ban hitting people with fish -- I defer again to Monty Python because these laws are such a joke)

Urolagnia (aka Water Sports)  (there is little or no health risks from this activity, contrary to popular belief, urine is sterile and can be used to cleanse wounds...so that's not it... ooooh!! It might remind people of female ejaculation! Or a girl might enjoy it! Yup, ban it!!!)

Role-playing as non-adults  (oh come the fuck on!! Seriously? You are gonna ban age play too! Of course you are. Missionary position is the only position! Just lie back and think of England for fucks sakes.)

Physical or verbal abuse (Come on now you fucking stupid cunts! Oh wait, sorry, that's banned too.)

Penetration by an object 'associated with violence'  (so don't have your male lead dress as a cop! And Grand Theft Auto V videogames can never be used for penetration.)

Physical restraints (where to begin...how many movies and TV shows show someone physically restrained? But add in sex -- the most natural thing in the world and *pop* BANNED)

and finally,

Strangulation (well, I can see this one as it could potentially kill someone... so 1 out of 13. FAIL! If you got 7% on a test in school, how would you feel? Like you knew absolutely nothing on the subject?)

I expect this shit -er, law --  to be overturned promptly as female ejaculation, female orgasms and female pleasure are what make life worth living. Then again, the fucked up state of affairs in government probably means they will just add things to the list and start handing out jail time for those caught with the offending materials.  I know! Let's start a war on porn and model it on the incredibly successful war on drugs!!! Fuck. My. Life.